“Just be confident. I think confidence is the most attractive part of a person.”~ Curtis Jackson
Self-love, body positivity and confidence have been at the forefront of social media for a few years now. While this is amazing news, the question is how many of us have actually become more confident during this time?
I recently did a poll question on my Instagram account, asking my followers if they believed they could do more to become happier and more confident, and 95% responded with yes, with only 4 people out of 85 saying no.
Being More Confident
Having read countless articles, books and posts about self-love, I have found that the one major thing that keeps coming up is affirmations. While these are an incredible additional tool to achieve confidence, it is not the most important component.
So… what is missing?
Do you pay more attention to your phone case than your actual phone?
Social media has brought a lifestyle into our generation, where looks matter more than character just like your possessions matter more than whether you are genuinely happy.
Showing off how perfect we are has become a dangerous and addicting normality for many of us and this is has led to us to forget that what matters most is what we carry inside our hearts.
Can Affirmations Really Help you Be More Confident?
Having spent 10 years of my life, hating my body and constantly punishing my character, you can imagine that I have tried and tested every way possible to fall in love with myself again, and I would like to share with you the one thing that has stood out the most to me.
In all this time that I spent despising my body, I never took a second to appreciate the fact that I was treating strangers with kindness, had the most amazing relationships with the people close to me and that I never ever gave up when things got tough. I had forgotten that my body was just an outer shell of who I really was and to put this into simple words: I want to you to ask yourself what matters more to you, your phone or your phone case?
There is so much more to us than our cellulite, uneven teeth, acne, and whichever other insecurities you may have defined yourself with. We are more than our academical achievements and our wage, our material belongings and our relationship status.
I remember reading ‘The Power of Now’ by Eckhardt Tolle, and being completely blown away by how wrong I had seen all of this over the years.
Becoming More Confident
I had focused on my looks, what other people would think of me, why I had not yet made millions even though I was 25 years old ‘already’, and so many other meaningless things until I realised that right now in this moment I was enough. That comparing myself to other people’s journey would never make me happy and that I should be proud of myself for everything I am now.
This article might leave you with the question, how to apply all of the above. Here’s what helped me tremendously on my journey to self-love:
I wrote down everything about my character that I loved, the things in my life that made me happy and everything I can be proud of daily. You can also ask your friends and family what they love about you and add it to the list.
Now, every time throughout the day, you get that negative voice in your head, you pull out the list and remind yourself of how beautiful you and your life really are. That will definitely make you more confident.
Yes, affirmations can help you become more confident but until you realise that your body is a simple vehicle for your beautiful character to shine through, to enjoy this moment right now and treat others how you would like to be treated, it’ll be extremely hard to make those affirmations become a reality.