I remember reading an article online about this female singer who was struggling with losing weight after giving birth to her first child, and when I scrolled down to read the comments I couldn’t believe how many horrible things people were saying about her, her body and about her weight gain.
“Oh dear Lord, she’s so fat.
What a big fat cow!
She used to be so skinny and beautiful, but now she’s disgusting…”
And on and on they went. It was horrible.
Learning to Make Peace with Your Body
I never really understood why in the world would anyone be offended by how another person looks, let alone by how much they weigh. And why would any sane person feel the need to express their opinions in such a toxic and poisonous way? What’s up with that? Where is all this anger and hate coming from?
I can’t even remember how many times I saw this, not just online and on TV, but offline as well. People using all kind of strange words to describe how they feel about other people’s bodies, making all kind of nasty remarks and saying things like:
“That girl needs to eat a sandwich. She’s so anorexic.
Is that even a woman? She looks like a stick.
Look at her, she’s so fat! Her butt is gigantic.
Look at that disgusting belly.
That chick has no butt.
Before anorexia, there was something called sexy.
Now that’s a real woman (a comment at a plus size model photo).”
I know we live in a society that encourages this kind of behavior through all kind of TV shows, magazines, movies, commercials etc., but that doesn’t mean we have to blindly follow “the trends.”
“It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.” ~ J. Krishnamurti
My body is my body, and your body is your body. How you look shouldn’t be something that concerns me, and how I look shouldn’t be something that concerns you. Why should I be offended by how your body looks? And why should you be bothered by how my body looks?
Who cares if I weigh 1000 pounds and you weigh 100 pounds? Is that even something worth talking about? Aren’t there more important things we need to deal with in our day to day lives?
Don’t you think it would be better to focus all that time and all that energy on learning to embrace and accept who we are and how our body looks instead of going around projecting our hidden frustrations, anger and insecurities on other people?
All these crazy comments and remarks about how a “real woman” should look like, about how much she should weigh and whether a woman is perceived as being beautiful based on how much she weighs and based on how her body looks… that’s just disturbing. It’s a crazy thing to do, and a crazy thing to say.
“True beauty is a ray That springs from the sacred depths of the soul, and illuminates the body, just as life springs from the kernel of a stone and gives colour and scent to a flower.” ~ Kahlil Gibran, Love Letters in the Sand
I remember being on a train once and hearing this young woman say to her friend while looking at some runway models on a fashion magazine the followings:“There was a time when the world saw a big curvy woman as being beautiful, but not anymore. Now they think these skinny bones are beautiful. That’s so stupid, don’t you think?”
And I couldn’t help but think:
“Who cares about what the world sees as beautiful?
Are you really going to allow their opinions to make you feel less beautiful?
The important thing is for you to know that you’re beautiful. All that matters is for you to accept, embrace, honor and love all that you are.
That’s all that matters…”
This world we live in, it’s a crazy world, no doubt about it, but that doesn’t mean we have to be crazy as well. We can be in this world, live in it and not do what the world does.
“A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?” ~ Albert Einstein
If according to “the experts”, in order for you to be considered beautiful, your body has to look in a certain way, and you have to be a certain weight, it doesn’t mean that you have to believe all that nonsense.
Each person is valuable and each body is beautiful, but don’t expect the world to tell you this. Because the world needs you to buy all those things that are “meant to make you feel beautiful”, and all those things that are “meant to make you feel better about yourself”. And if you stop believing their nonsense and if you start seeing how beautiful you truly are and that your body is perfect just the way it is, you might stop buying their “happiness, self-worth, and approval“, and they might run out of business.
All this hate directed at other people’s bodies, and all these ideas about what beauty is, and what the perfect and ideal weight should be, they are all unnecessary.
There’s no single formula based on which beauty can be measured, nor is there a certain weight and body type that defines what a beautiful and valuable human being is. And a person who knows his/her real worth would never allow other people’s ideas and opinions to dictate how they should feel about themselves, how they should dress, how much they should weigh and how they should live their whole lives.
Nor will they go around saying horrible things about those whose bodies look different than his/her body. Because when you are at peace with yourself, your body and your life, you are at peace with everything and everyone.
It’s those who aren’t at peace with themselves and their bodies who feel the need to pick on other people’s bodies. It’s those who “follow the trends” and who believe that the world knows more about how much each individual is worth than the individual himself, that go around acting all crazy and saying all sorts of mean things.
“The greatest difficulty is that men do not think enough of themselves, do not consider what it is that they are sacrificing when they follow in a herd, or when they cater for their establishment.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
It’s not the world you should expect to see your true beauty and perfection, it’s you!
It’s you who has to learn to make peace with your body and recognize how beautiful you are, how much you’re actually worth, and how wonderful your body is. Because if you learn to honor all that you are, and if you learn to treasure, accept, embrace and love yourself fully – mind, body, and soul, you will know how to do the same for everyone else.
Make peace with your body. Embrace all that you are and forget about what the world thinks. Set your own standards. Create your own rules. Follow your own trends. And make sure to always treat everyone with the love and respect you yourself want to be treated.
The end! 🙂
Do you agree that when you make peace with your body, you are also at peace with everyone else’s bodies – how they look and how much they weigh? I really want to know what are your thoughts on this. You can share your comment by joining the conversation in the comment section below 🙂