“Change your attitude and you change your life. You cannot control what happens to you in your life, but you can always control how you respond to it. The way you choose to respond is a reflection of your attitude. By changing your attitude, you also change your perspective and change your life.”~ Roy Bennett
What I will share with you today are some of the things that have helped me return to a place of love and inner peace, allowing me to live my life in a beautiful, harmonious and authentic way.
Hope they will help you as much they helped me.
P.S. By putting these things into practice and by committing to going back to your true and authentic Self, your whole life will be transformed in a very positive and empowering way.
Change Your Life
“There is only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving, and that’s your own SELF.” ~ Aldous Huxley
12 Ways to Change Your Life Through the Art of Self Mastery
1. Change your life by giving yourself-permission to be selfish
In a world that is constantly trying to make you something, you are not, staying true to your Self-requires a great deal of strength and courage. Rediscovering your own SELF, your own beauty, and your own power requires you to be selfish and to put your needs before the needs of others.
“He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle himself away.” ~ Raymond Hull
2. Change your life by letting go of the need for approval
Ever since you were a little boy/ girl you were taught to believe that being good and acting in a specific way will make people like you. You started acting in all kind of ways not because you wanted and it felt right deep down inside but because you knew THEY will like it.
You forgot about yourself, about your own needs and desires and you started focusing more on pleasing others instead of pleasing your own self, not knowing that self-worth comes from yourself not from others and that is exactly why is called self-worth and not others worth.
“All my life I had been looking for something, and everywhere I turned someone tried to tell me what it was… It took me a long time and much painful boomeranging of my expectations to achieve a realization everyone else appears to have been born with: that I am nobody but my SELF.” ~ Ralph Ellison
3. Change your life by transcending the ego
The moment you start identifying yourself with your possessions, your age, your looks, religion, country, etc., you begin to see yourself as being better/worse, valuable/ less valuable than others, negating your real essence, your real value and your real SELF… and you strengthen the EGO – the false self.
“Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.” ~ Carl Jung
4. Change your life by peeling off the layers of “mud”
Since childhood, you have been covered with layers and layers of mud and this mud represents all the limitations, all the bad programming and all the past conditioning that came from many of the people you interacted with.
You chose to take their beliefs, their reality and make it your own. It all became part of you and you never stopped to ask yourself whether all of those beliefs were true or not, whether any of those beliefs were really yours… You adopted them without questioning their authenticity.
“Your work is to discover your world and then with all your heart give yourself to it.” ~ Buddha
5. Change your life by acknowledging your Self
Compared with the EGO, which is constantly looking to be better than everybody else, always comparing and always competing, the SELF is always loving, always peaceful and always forgiving.
Whenever you are thinking, feeling, saying or doing something that is not coming from a loving place, know that you are activating from the ego and not the self.
Constantly look for ways to share what you know, who you are and what you have with others and by doing so you will manage to strengthen and acknowledge the self more and more.
“Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.” ~ Aristotle
6. Change your life by taking time to be quiet
Taking time to be alone with your own Self is one of the most important things you can do for yourself.
Thinking you don’t have 5 – 10 minutes per day to spend in silence is like saying that you would rather walk from U.S. to China than take a plane because that is exactly what quiet time does for you. Solitude, contemplation, meditation helps speed up things, helping you attract more of the things you love and need at a faster rate because you see, just like Aristotle said it, “Contemplation is the highest form of activity.”
7. Change your life by keeping a journal
There is so much power in journaling because it helps you become aware of your own thoughts and emotions, of what and who you THINK you are, helping you see things from a totally different perspective.
You will get to a point where you will no longer say, I Am angry, but rather, there is anger in me and by doing so you manage to tap into your inner peace and happiness.
“Journal writing is a voyage to the interior.” ~ Christina Baldwin
8. Change your life by becoming the observer of your own life
When you start doing all of these things and many others, you get to a point where you can detach from your own body and you can become the observer of your own life.
You will be able to see things from a different perspective and when all kind of challenges will come your way, you will pause and instead of reacting, you will respond. You will no longer be a victim of your own thoughts and emotions because you will no longer see yourself as being one with them.
“You will recognize your own path when you come upon it because you will suddenly have all the energy and imagination you will ever need.” ~ Jerry Gillies
9. Change your life by purifying your thoughts – thoughts have power, choose the good ones
Thoughts have the power to manifest themselves into action and it’s up to you to always choose the best of thoughts and constantly work on creating a life that you enjoy living.
“Watch your thoughts, for they become words. Watch your words, for they become actions. Watch your actions, for they become habits. Watch your habits, for they become a character. Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.” ~ Unknown
10. Let go of all thoughts of separation
Often times we act as if we are here on this Planet all alone against the whole world, not understanding that we are in the world and the world in us, not understanding that we are all ONE with it.
We are all in this together and it’s our responsibility to help one another grow and evolve, and “If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them.” Dalai Lama
11. Change your life by remove all your masks
The world is full of people who wear all kind of masks and who are constantly trying to get approval from outside themselves, ignoring their own thoughts, their own feelings, and their own needs. You have no idea how much the world needs you to be you and how much the world will admire you the moment you choose to step into your Super Self and embrace who you really are, completely!
“The most important kind of freedom is to be what you really are. You trade in your reality for a role. You trade in your sense for an act. You give up your ability to feel, and in exchange, put on a MASK.” ~ Jim Morrison
Remove all your mask because the world needs people like you, people who are true to themselves, unique and original.
“God has given you one face, and you make yourself another.”~ William Shakespeare
12. No sense of separation – connect with all that is.
When you allow your Self to just be, your whole world will be transformed and you will change your life.
You will start to feel a great deal of inner peace, inner joy and tranquility.
You will drop all your defenses and you will no longer spend time judging and labeling people because you will now be too busy loving them 🙂
You will finally understand that you are part of them and they are part of you. There is no separation, only the one that was created by our mind, by our ego.
And this is how you can change your life and go back to being your real and authentic Self 🙂
Why do you think is so hard for people to stay true to themselves? I really want to know what are your thoughts on this. You can share your insights by joining the conversation in the comment section below
at 10:08 am
That’s the funny thing Kan, we first have to be selfish, take care of our own needs and desires, give ourselves as much love as we can give and by doing so we will realize there is no separation. When you get to the point where you are full of love and you have nothing else to give to those around you but love that’s when you realize that there is no separation between us, we are all one.
This is the art of self mastery. By taking good care of yourself, you will be able to take care of everyone around you 🙂 xo
at 11:33 am
Some really great thought provoking quotations here. I think this should be on the school curriculum under life skills – realising your potential.
at 8:14 am
Lovely post. But got confused with the first and the tenth point. If one is supposed to be selfish then how can he also think that we are all ONE in the tenth point !!!
at 12:58 pm
So happy to hear you in the program with Dr. Wayne Dyer. Be gratful and thankful is the best gift in life.
at 7:13 pm
this is very inspiring and timely for me, thanks!
at 9:36 pm
Awesome list! Thanks as this is a great reminder to keep on the path that I’m on and not get distracted by worldly things.
at 5:18 pm
This article was the best one yet! I have paid therapists money to achieve peace in my life. Where were you in the 80s? Just kidding. I have a therapist who has helped me attain the peace and found my true self. It is very important to find peace/meditate at least 10 minutes each day. I turned 60 in March and have never felt better! Your articles are fantastic!
at 4:27 pm
“The master key to self-mastery is self-forgetting.”
(from the Baha’i writings)
at 12:43 pm
Love this post. I needed this reminder this morning as I am embarking on a new career. Everything you said is so true and it really does work. Great post!
at 10:35 am
Great summary and collection of ideas that enables us all to transcend the illusion of self, and awake to our true nature, our SELF.
at 6:11 am
truly awesome. i’ve read and shared quite a few of these purpose fairy nuggets of golden wisdom…but THIS ONE truly speaks to me right now.
thank you thank you.
at 4:14 pm
Nicely said, lots of people are unhappy and seek happiness through external means (money, material goods, trophies, etc.), but they’ll rarely be happy long term.
What if you only focused on 2-3, what should they be? From my read of the 12 points and my personal experience, I would say start with
– minding the comments you make to yourself: anytime you say anything negative, compensate by saying 1-2 positive things positive since your unconscious is so important to happiness (point 9)
– anytime you’re walking alone think about the things you’re grateful for (things, people, parts of your personality)- similar to keeping a journal (point 7) but no excuse not to do it!
– realise that you decide to be happy. No one else will do it for you and frankly others may try to stop you. (point 2 self approval)
It took me 30 years to be happy in me, and now I feel whole, at one. Thank you for a great article danaadmin (if that is your real name…)