Unconditional love is transcendent. When we experience it in our relationships and communities, we feel safe. It creates a foundation that cannot be shaken by disagreements, stress, or dissatisfaction.
When you show someone, unconditional love, you demonstrate that you care about them in a selfless way that isn’t limited by any predetermined set of parameters. Showing unconditional love isn’t done through major gestures though.
It’s accomplished through consistent, daily actions.
Approach Disagreements With Loved Ones as a Problem to Tackle as a Team
Unfortunately, many of us are wired to treat disagreements as battles to win. Our sparring partners are often the people we’re supposed to love. Without intending to, you can create or contribute to a situation that makes the other person feel as if your love depends on them conforming to your point of view.
Change this by reframing disagreements. Ask your loved one to partner with you so that you can solve your disagreement together. This way it becomes a team effort, not a challenge between you.
Let Them Help You
Constantly giving of yourself in a relationship isn’t healthy. It’s bad for you, and it’s bad for your loved ones. You don’t get your needs met. You also create an imbalance of power that can put your loved one in a constant state of obligation.
If you enjoy doing things for your loved ones, you can be sure they feel the same way. Give them permission to share their love with you through action. Ask for help. Accept help. Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable. Give them the gift of allowing them to show you love and to be nurturing.
Chances are that right now there are people in your family, in your circle of friends, and in your community who need your unconditional love. They need that whether or not you understand or agree with their choices, and whether or not you are happy with them.
Avoid equating love and approval. Love doesn’t need approval or agreement to exist. Connect with loved ones who are frustrating you, and let them know that you care. Volunteer your time helping people who have problems you will never personally experience.
Understand Love Language
Your love language is the way that you tend to express love. It’s also exemplified in the ways in which you prefer that others show their love to you. The different love languages are, physical touch, receiving gifts, acts of service, quality time, and words of affirmation.
Love language isn’t just for couples. It’s something that you can apply in all relationships. It’s a great way to better understand why people act the way that they do.
Here’s something to keep in mind. Typically, people show love in the way that they want to receive it. To give unconditional love, you have to turn that around. Learn the other person’s preferred love language, then love them in that way. It’s the most selfless way to express love.
Work Hard to Create Positive Interactions
Have you ever gone an entire day without sharing a hug or kiss with someone you love, or without sharing some experience that both of you enjoy?
You aren’t alone.
It’s even worse when your relationship with your loved one is in a place of disharmony. Butting heads or simply existing without connecting becomes the norm.
It’s so important to have daily interactions with people that are supportive, affectionate, and positive. It takes effort and commitment to make that happen. Carve out time to spend with the people you love where any disagreements or hard relationship work are put aside. Find things to do together that are enjoyable for both of you during these moments.
Care For Yourself
You can’t show unconditional love when your own cup is empty. Treat self-care as a necessity and an obligation. You aren’t treating yourself. You’re taking necessary action to maintain your wellbeing. Set boundaries. Get the sleep you need. Eat well.
Don’t allow people to treat you poorly. Correct your internal dialogue when it becomes negative. When you are happy and healthy, you are in the best position to meet other people’s needs.F
We all crave unconditional love. When we give it, we show others that they are worthy of love without any limitations. That’s something that can be applied to the way we treat our loved one, our communities, and ourselves.