“But it is not what I am saying that is hurting you; it is that you have wounds that I touch by what I have said. You are hurting yourself. There is no way I can take this personally.”~ Don Miguel Ruiz, The Four Agreements
The Four Agreements
In the search for wisdom and guidance, only a few teachings have resonated as profoundly as Don Miguel Ruiz’s The Four Agreements. Within these timeless principles lie valuable lessons that have the potential to transform our understanding of ourselves and the world around us.
From cultivating an impeccable word, to letting go of assumptions, each lesson invites us to embrace new life perspectives and awaken the true potential that we’ve all been gifted with.
28 Valuable Lessons The Four Agreements Taught Us About Life
What I will share with you today are 28 most valuable lessons The Four Agreements has taught us life, lessons that are still relevant today, tomorrow and in the years to come. Enjoy.
The First Agreement: Be Impeccable with Your Word
“If others say one thing, but do another, you are lying to yourself if you don’t listen to their actions. But if you are truthful with yourself, you will save yourself a lot of emotional pain. Telling yourself the truth about it may hurt, but you don’t need to be attached to the pain. Healing is on the way, and it’s just a matter of time before things will be better for you.”~ The Four Agreements
“Go inside and listen to your body, because your body will never lie to you. Your mind will play tricks, but the way you feel in your heart, in your guts, is the truth.”~ The Four Agreements
“Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.”~ The Four Agreements
“We have learned to live our lives trying to satisfy other people’s demands. We have learned to live by other people’s points of view because of the fear of not being accepted and of not being good enough for someone else.”~ The Four Agreements
“You can measure the impeccability of your word by your level of self-love. How much you love yourself and how you feel about yourself are directly proportionate to the quality and integrity of your word. When you are impeccable with your word, you feel good; you feel happy and at peace.”~ The Four Agreements
“The freedom we are looking for is the freedom to be ourselves, to express ourselves. But if we look at our lives we will see that most of the time we do things just to please others, just to be accepted by others, rather than living our lives to please ourselves.”~ The Four Agreements
“Very young children are not afraid to express what they feel. They are so loving that if they perceive love, they melt into love. They are not afraid to love at all. That is the description of a normal human being.”~ The Four Agreements
The Second Agreement: Don’t take Anything Personally
“But it is not what I am saying that is hurting you; it is that you have wounds that I touch by what I have said. You are hurting yourself. There is no way I can take this personally.”~ The Four Agreements
“Taking things personally makes you easy prey for these predators, the black magicians. They can hook you easily with one little opinion and feed you whatever poison they want, and because you take it personally, you eat it up.”~ The Four Agreements
“Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.”~ The Four Agreements
“If someone is not treating you with love and respect, it is a gift if they walk away from you. If that person doesn’t walk away, you will surely endure many years of suffering with him or her. Walking away may hurt for a while, but your heart will eventually heal. Then you can choose what you really want. You will find that you don’t need to trust others as much as you need to trust yourself to make the right choices.”~ The Four Agreements
“Even when a situation seems so personal, even if others insult you directly, it has nothing to do with you. What they say, what they do, and the opinions they give are according to the agreements they have in their own minds. Their point of view comes from all the programming they received during domestication.”~ The Four Agreements
“Whatever happens around you, don’t take it personally… Nothing other people do is because of you. It is because of themselves.”~ The Four Agreements
“We must forgive those we feel have wronged us, not because they deserve to be forgiven but because we love ourselves so much we don’t want to keep paying for the injustice…when someone can touch a wound and it no longer hurts you then you know you have truly forgiven.”~ The Four Agreements
The Third Agreement: Don’t Make Assumptions.
“We don’t see the truth because we are blind. What blinds us are all those false beliefs we have in our mind. We have the need to be right and to make others wrong. We trust what we believe, and our beliefs set us up for suffering.”~ The Four Agreements
“We judge others according to our image of perfection as well, and naturally they fall short of our expectations.”~ The Four Agreements
“Ninety-five percent of the beliefs we have stored in our minds are nothing but lies, and we suffer because we believe all these lies.”~ The Four Agreements
“Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness, and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.”~ The Four Agreements
“Imagine living your life without judging others. You can easily forgive others and let go of any judgments that you have. You don’t have the need to be right, and you don’t need to make anyone else wrong. You respect yourself and everyone else, and they respect you in return.”~ The Four Agreements
“Wherever you go you will find people lying to you, and as your awareness grows, you will notice that you also lie to yourself. Do not expect people to tell you the truth because they also lie to themselves. You have to trust yourself and choose to believe or not to believe what someone says to you.”~ The Four Agreements
“Whenever we hear an opinion and believe it, we make an agreement, and it becomes part of our belief system.”~ The Four Agreements
The Fourth Agreement: Always Do Your Best.
“When you surrender and let go of the past, you allow yourself to be fully alive in the moment. Letting go of the past means you can enjoy the dream that is happening right now.”~ The Four Agreements
“Just do your best — in any circumstance in your life. It doesn’t matter if you are sick or tired, if you always do your best there is no way you can judge yourself.”~ The Four Agreements
“I will no longer allow anyone to manipulate my mind and control my life in the name of love.”~ The Four Agreements
“Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret.”~ The Four Agreements
“You will find that you don’t need to trust others as much as you need to trust yourself to make the right choices.”~ The Four Agreements
“God is life. God is life in action. The best way to say, “I love you, God,” is to live your life doing your best. The best way to say, “Thank you, God,” is by letting go of the past and living in the present moment, right here and now. Whatever life takes away from you, let it go. ~ The Four Agreements
“You were born with the right to be happy. You were born with the right to love, to enjoy and to share your love. You are alive, so take your life and enjoy it. Don’t resist life passing through you, because that is God passing through you. Just your existence proves the existence of God. Your existence proves the existence of life and energy.”~ The Four Agreements