“Come on. Don’t take it personally. Not everything is about you, you know? Other people have their own internal struggles and demons they need to fight – all on their own – without you having to make them feel guilty and ashamed for having to heal their wounds. Please, don’t take it personally…” ~ Luminita D. Saviuc
Don’t Take It Personally
Have you noticed how easy it is these days for people to get offended… to take things personally? Every little thing that is being said is twisted and turned and blown out of proportions.
You can’t speak your mind, get lost in your thoughts or even be true to yourself because somebody somewhere will find it offensive.
It’s ridiculous.
Where there is a lack of self-esteem, there is a tendency to take things personally. To think everything is an attack on your person. But that is not the case.
Come on. Don’t take it personally. Not everything is about you
The world is not out to get you. Nor is everything that others say or do about you, you know? People have their own problems. They have their own wounds they need to heal, old programs they haven’t yet moved past, fears that keep them paralyzed and unconscious beliefs they desperately try to let go of. But that doesn’t mean you have to take it personally and make it all about you.
There are certain things that just aren’t about you. And should be left that way.
To take it personally; to get offended and act as though everything is about you; to make people feel guilty for being who they are and where they are in their lives is to burden and deny them the right to heal and to walk their path with grace, love, humility and integrity…
Why would you want to do that?
People need space and time away. Why take it personally?
There are times when people simply need space and time away – from everything and everyone – to clear their mind, to find their center and figure out a way to heal their wounds and let go of the painful memories that keep them from fully living their lives.
They have a right to that, you know?
They have a right to their own thoughts and feelings. They have a right to do what they want, when they want to, and with whomever they please, and if they please.
They have a right to feel hurt, to feel pain, to feel angry and to feel all the things that come from being human and alive.
They have a right to say ‘no’ – to an invitation to dinner, an outing or to whatever the occasion may be – without always having to give an explanation or an excuse.
Because as Jules Renard said so beautifully,
“The truly free man is he who can decline a dinner invitation without giving an excuse.” ~ Jules Renard
And another one of my favorites,
“Never complain, never explain — your friends do not need it, and your enemies will not believe you anyway.” ~ Elbert Hubbard
Allow people to be who they are.
If you truly love people as much as you say you do, give them their space.
Do not burden them with your projections, expectations and attachments and call that ‘love’. For that is not love, just an unhealthy attachment.
Enough with all these silly games. Allow people to be who they are and you will be amazed at how much they will love you for it.
No more playing games. No more trying to guilt and shame people into doing these things, both you and them know in your hearts they shouldn’t be doing.
If you want something from others, give it to yourself.
Don’t go around acting as though the world owes you something. For the world owes you nothing. It is you who owes you everything. And by everything I mean, everything – your truth, authenticity, honesty, love, humility, forgiveness, compassion, and all the other things you used to demand and expect from others.
Leave people alone and place your focus back on you.
Ask yourself: What is it that I expect, demand and hope to receive from others? And offer all of these things to yourself. Do not demand them from others. Demand them only from yourself…
** What about you? Do you take it personally when people don’t respond to your needs and expectations as you would want them to? Or do you give them the space and freedom to be who they are without taking things personally? You can share below 🙂
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Luminita D. Saviuc
Luminita is the Founder and Editor in Chief of PurposeFairy.com and also the author of 15 Things You Should Give Up to Be Happy: An Inspiring Guide to Discovering Effortless Joy. For more details check out the 15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy Book Page.
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