“The problem is that we have been told that we need to fix ourselves to have what we want. That we need improvement. That we are broken and flawed and that this” thing” will make it all better. Now it’s not anyone’s fault. Our society has always been stuck in the problem-solving orientation..”~ Jenn Rosner
Have you ever thought to yourself “I don’t understand why after all the work I have done on myselI still can’t get out of my own way? I am so tired of being disappointed again and again. Should I just give up and stop trying?”
This is what I know. The old way, the way of self improvement, fixing myself and healing didn’t work for me.
After all the years doing therapy, healing, and energy work I was still stuck, lost, I was existing instead of living, and I still felt like I didn’t fit in this world.
You see we have been programmed since birth that you need to do something to have something.
When we are in our mother’s womb, we have everything that we need. We are loved, fed, protected. We don’t have to do anything, it’s just there for us. Then we are born and suddenly it’s not automatically given to us anymore. We then get wounded and have to make up stories and beliefs about what WE did to lose it.
The Stories You Hear about Self Improvement
These stories and beliefs then become our view of the world and we spend our whole lives on this hamster wheel trying to get back to the place where we have it all again. It just doesn’t work. It’s like being on a mary-go-round .The hoses move but you aren’t going anywhere.
So how do you step off it? Do you do some improve your beliefs? Think positive?
How Far Will Self Improvement Actually Take You?
The problem is that we have been told that we need to fix ourselves to have what we want. That we need improvement. That we are broken and flawed and that this” thing” will make it all better. Now it’s not anyone’s fault. Our society has always been stuck in the problem-solving orientation.
We don’t know any better. So well-meaning people perpetuate this idea that if you don’t have what you want it’s because of you. After all you are always the common denominator, right?
What if I told you that you could be exactly who you are AND create a life that you love? The key is realizing that YOU are not the reason that things haven’t worked out.
When I first heard this concept it was the most freeing experience. To think that I am NOT fundamentally broken, I have just been living in the wrong structure. So I had to learn how to shift into the creative structure. Instead of problem solving I started focusing on what I wanted to create, I began visualizing myself already having it.
I took a minute to acknowledge where I was currently, and I began removing anything that was keeping me stuck. Then all I had to do was take next obvious action.
You see success isn’t personal. It’s structural.
When your Focus is on fixing the problem you will always be in cycle of self-sabotage, two steps forward one step back. You will always feel that there is something else you could do, maybe this one thing will tip the scales in your favor and life will finally be easy. You will always be powerless over your internal and external circumstances.
When you are in the creative structure your focus is forward thinking. Where are you going? What do you want to create? You own the fact that you are the powerful creative force in your life. Your internal and external circumstances no longer define or control you.
You know that you are not broken, and you can stop working on your improvement. You can stop trying to “fix” yourself.
Since studying the method, I was finally able to find a place in this world. I was able to let go of the idea that all of my “flaws” and “failures” were my fault. The only reason that I couldn’t create what I wanted was because of resistance (learned/ inherited habits, patterns, and beliefs) and since they are learned they could actually be shifted, changed and/or removed.
“Be inspired by what other people are doing and achieving, but STOP comparing yourself to them. You are not them. Your self improvement is about setting your own goals, pushing your own limits, breaking your own personal records, being better than you were yesterday, and living YOUR best life. You are not in competition with other people. Work each day to be a better YOU, not better than anyone else.” ~ Tanya Masse
I realized that I am the same person when I feel stuck that I am when I create something that I desire because you take yourself with you wherever you go, and you don’t need any improvement.