For years, I’ve faced intense heartbreak and had to do the hard self-work to get through them. I turned heartbreak into feelings of hope and what kept me going was knowing that during the darkest of times is where the brightest of lights shine.~ Kim Nguyen
For some people, there’s always that one heartbreak that lingers inside of you.
The person who you thought was the one all your dreams were made of. Dreams of our future, kids, house, vacations, and memories filled your hopeful heart.
Time goes by living in happiness until one day you realize this person isn’t actually the one for you. Then, you have to make the hard decision to walk your separate paths, trusting it’s the right decision despite how hard it is.
So you pack your stuff, say goodbye to the life you’ve known, and start the journey to rebuild your life, hoping that you can do this on your own.
The sudden change of reality feels like a fuzzy daydream, not quite sure if it’s real. Then slowly, the raw, intricate, and dark emotions of the heartbreak creep in.
It may take time to face these uncomfortable feelings but eventually, you need to. The sooner you face the hardship, the sooner you set yourself free from the past and can finally move on.
Whether you face heartbreak from a serious relationship or after divorce, it’s not always the easiest to endure these dark times.
For years, I’ve faced intense heartbreak and had to do the hard self-work to get through them. I turned heartbreak into feelings of hope and what kept me going was knowing that during the darkest of times is where the brightest of lights shine.
So, here are 5 ways in which you too can turn heartbreak into hope, and overcome the hardships of a breakup and the package of emotions that comes with it.
How to Turn Heartbreak Into Hope After a Breakup
1. Turn Abandonment into Fulfilment.
Even if the relationship ending was of both agreeing to it, certain feelings of abandonment may surface. A person who was a significant part of your life walked out of it and they’re not coming back.
You may feel alone and isolated. Your thoughts ruminate into the negative space instead of looking towards the positive. You question your decisions. You question yourself, but you are not abandoned.
The most important person who will always be by your side is YOU. You are complete and whole as you are.
Find fulfillment in the parts of your life that bring you joy, and more joy will come. And in doing so, you will open yourself up to new people and experiences that will layer your life with more beauty than you could ever imagine.
Have faith!
2. Turn Bitterness into Gratitude.
Your dreams may have completely shattered. Your direction may have completely shifted, and you may not be sure how to move forward.
You’re bitter about how things turned out and wish it could have gone differently. But you can’t go back to the past. What you can do si to envision a brighter future and take definite steps in making it happen.
You always have a choice.
You can either feel sad or just embrace what happened. You can dwell in the negative or nurture a more positive attitude. You can turn ugliness into beauty. You can linger in empty bitterness or find peace in expressing gratitude for whatever life brings your way.
You choose!
3. Turn Confusion into Clarity.
Life is richer and fuller because of the contrast you’ve seen, what you’ve experienced. This has given you a lens to see what you don’t want so you know more clearly what you actually want in the future.
Just because you’ve experienced heartbreak it doesn’t mean your life ais any less meaningful.
You’ve gained more clarity about yourself through these experiences and sometimes the toughest experiences bring with them the most valuable lessons.
You may not understand now why you had to go through such heartbreak but trust that in time, its’ meaning will be revealed to you.
4. Turn Rejection into Acceptance.
Just because a relationship didn’t work out, it doesn’t mean another love won’t. Work on accepting the past, forgive, let it go, and take with your only the lessons you’ve learned from it.
Accept that none of us is perfect. We all come with flaws and unique characteristics. The one meant for you will accept and love you just the way you are, flawed and all.
5. Turn Feeling Unloved into Truly Loved.
You will have moments when you long for the days with your partner. And yes, maybe you have taken for granted what it was like to have someone constantly by your side. Maybe without them, you’ll feel unloved. But if you take the time to look around, love exists in so many forms that you don’t always see like our family, friends, and even colleagues.
As you share more about your experience of heartbreak, the more you realize you are loved.
Remember this: as you open your heart again, others will open theirs too.
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Kim Nguyen
Kim Nguyen is the author of In and Out of Love, a book of love poems for the hopeless romantics and heartbroken (but hopeful) lovers. She is a writer who thinks everything goes better savored with coffee. Through her artistic visions and creations, she is committed to inspiring others to follow their dreams. To know more about Kim and her work on her site www.kimntnguyen.com
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