“Heaven knows we need never be ashamed of our tears, for they are rain upon the blinding dust of earth, overlying our hard hearts. I was better after I had cried, than before–more sorry, more aware of my own ingratitude, more gentle.” ~ Charles Dickens
Crying is Good For You
My entire life I have been a crier. Tears would involuntarily come to my eyes almost every day. In movies, in conversation, in hearing or seeing something sad, in missing someone I loved, in arguing with someone I loved, in feeling frustrated about life – the tears began to pour like rain.
I have cried everywhere and in front of everyone. I once cried when talking to my boss about getting a raise. I once cried in a bathroom stall after giving my first public speech. And numerous times while hearing others share from their hearts. On a plane, in a train – you name it. I share this with you because I know I am not alone.
Sometimes they were tears of joy but more often there was deep sadness and overwhelm. I would wish that I wasn’t so sensitive. I would wonder why others were so good at blocking out the pain. I began to think that there was something wrong with me. Perhaps I needed help to navigate life and toughen up so I wouldn’t be so soft.
After decades of resisting my tears or seeing them as wrong, I began to love my sensitivity, my tears, my ability to feel so much. As a coach and teacher, the most common thing that comes out of a powerful session is tears. Tears are healing, they are the release of cortisol, they are a magical mechanism for cleansing and clearing out.
Now I love my tears, the fact that I can feel so much for so many and I allow myself to cry. Here are a few reasons crying is good for you:
Water especially salt water is purging your entire system of stress hormones and even toxins. Just like a clean shower removes all the dirt and dust that accumulates during the day, each time you cry you are cleaning up what’s inside.
Do you ever feel really good after you cry? Studies have shown that crying produces feel good endorphins. It’s as if you just went for a jog and expressed all this energy. Crying is good for you.
Crying is good for you. Crying is healing, it is an emotional feeling from your core that is arising to the surface to be expressed and restored. With each tear, you are connecting to and listening to your heart.
Another reason you may feel good after a cry is because you are letting go of stress, sadness, pain, anxiousness, and helplessness. These feelings want to and need to come up to the surface in order to be healed. With each cry, you’re a creating space for something new.
Crying is a part of the process of grieving. It helps us to get through the pain and shock of loss. Anytime of loss, not only the passing of a loved one because although we cannot see it, we are all taking steps toward healing our lives throughout our lives. Crying is a paramount part of this journey.
There are many outdated models of judgment and health that we still buy in to. One of them is that crying means you are weak, soft, and falling a part. This couldn’t be farther from the truth. Crying is a sign of courage, strength, and wisdom.
We have the ability to self-heal and self-soothe, allowing ourselves to feel this deeply and then release and renew is the magic of this life. I invite you to cry whenever it comes up, even if it is embarrassing – let it out and let it up. It is your greatest tool for healing.