Why Being Kind to People is Better than Being Right

“You can’t shake hands with a clenched fist.” Indira Gandhi

A while back I wrote this post called 15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy, and because of the many requests I got, asking to go deeper into each thing, I decided to do just that.

Today we will focus on the letting go of the need to always be right and why is it important to do so.

Why Being Kind to People is Better than Being Right

I will say that giving up the need to always be right, it’s one of the most important lessons we can learn from life, a lesson that will help us achieve peace of mind and improve the quality of our relationship, not only with those around us but with ourselves also.

Who cares if you are right or not? Who cares if after a very long and intense argument you “win”? Does this really bring pleasure to you?

You hold onto an idea so strongly and you are willing to make the other person feel so bad just so you can show you are right. Is it really worth it? I doubt it.

I think you should just do a test. Next time you feel the urge to strongly disagree with somebody over something you know for sure that you are right, pause for a second and ask yourself: Do I really care more about being right than about the quality of the relationship I have with this person?

Of course, I am not saying that you should compromise and that you should just nod your head, approving everything that others have to say, because that will be quite silly, and you will never learn how to have a proper conversation where you express your point of view, but what I am saying is to work on giving up the need to always be right, leaving your ego behind, to always choose to be kind to people over right, choosing to disagree without being disagreeable. It’s not a race, it’s not all about who is right and who is not.

Instead of arguing over who is right and who is not, not even listening to what the other person has to say because while they talk, you are rearranging your thoughts and preparing your speech, you can choose to silent your mind and to actually pay attention to what the other person has to say.

Believe me, you will learn so much more from doing that. You have two ears and one mouth for a reason, don’t you think? So why not choose growth over stagnation, why not choose to be kind to people instead of being right? Just give it a try and see what happens.

~love, Luminita💫

Sharing is caring!

FavoriteLoadingAdd to favorites


Luminita D. Saviuc

Luminita, the Founder of PurposeFairy, is an enthusiastic student of the arts, psychology, and spirituality. Her acclaimed blog post, 15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy , was shared by over 1.3 million people on Facebook. Later on, it became the heart of her book, 15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy., book that was published by Penguin Random House. For more details check out the 15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy Book Page.

read more


  • Jeff Small

    4, September 2012 at 12:06 am

    Why be right when we can be together

  • rohita

    9, June 2012 at 11:51 pm

    While this is true in most cases, I do believe that if it is a question of your principles and a certain value system that defines your life path, there is no harm is arguing (till the very end). Not doing so sends far too many messages, most importantly to yourself. And after sufficient time passes, you will realize that that particular “relationship” you “lost” was never really “yours” to begin with, or it somehow conflicted with your life path and you are in a way, better off without it. At the end of the day, you have to be true to yourself and if it means having a timely argument to clarify it for yourself and weeding out unneccesary or conflicting relationships, then that is what you should do to become happier.


    9, June 2012 at 6:52 pm

    so telling the truth is not right

  • danaadmin

    9, June 2012 at 5:42 pm

    That is true. There is no right or wrong, just a different way of doing things 🙂 Infinite Love and Peace!

  • tiki

    9, June 2012 at 3:12 pm

    Early in our marriage, my husband and I adopted the phase “You are doing it differently!” It replaced the constant litany of “You are doing it wrong.” when talking about how the dishes went in the dishwasher or how to hold the knife to cut the apple or how to do something techie on the computer. There is a lot of truth in “differently” where “wrong” just holds judgement. “Differently” allows for perspective and learning. It really doesn’t matter how the apple gets cut, just that it gets cut, but there might be a different way that better utilizes our tools and resources. Making someone wrong, rather than different, is a false defeat/victory and only creates an illusion of delusion.

  • Calvin

    8, April 2012 at 7:30 pm

    I agree. That sort of is what Dale Carnegie was preaching. It is hard, especially surrounded by people who don’t compromise.