How To Let Go of Insecurities: 7 Steps To Build Your Confidence

“Self-worth comes from one thing – thinking that you are worthy.” ~ Wayne Dyer

It’s okay to have insecurities, we all do and it’s crucial for us to observe and understand the impact these insecurities have on the quality of our lives. It’s our responsibility to learn how to control these insecurities and not let them control us.

If you are open and willing to shake your limiting beliefs and insecurities a little bit so that you can regain the power and control over your life, these 7 steps will help you do just that.

1. Accept the truth – “no one can make you feel inferior without your consent”

Nobody knows your struggles better than you do; nobody knows your life experiences better than you do. Whether you’ve been through a lot or not in your life by now and whether you feel like a victim, whether you feel like people treated you rightly or not, it’s important for you to realize, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” ~ Eleanor Roosevelt

2. Let the healing process begin

People have insecurities not because they were exposed to too much positivity, encouragement, and happiness but rather because those close to them criticized them because they were exposed to destructive behaviors. Usually, insecurities come from a time when you were hurt and injured emotionally. Somebody said/did something to you that made you sad/hurt and often these insecurities originate in childhood. See if you can go back in time, see if you can remember how it all started, where it all originated. This practice is really therapeutic and will help you heal most of your wounds and insecurities. Let go of the old you and allow fresh new positive thoughts to enter your mind.

“You have the power to heal your life, and you need to know that. We think so often that we are helpless, but we’re not. We always have the power of our minds…Claim and consciously use your power.” ~ Louise L. Hay

3. Ask questions

Whenever you have a thought that is not beneficial to you pop in your mind, just ask yourself questions like:

“Do these thoughts have any real foundation?

Will they matter 10 years from now?

Are they helping me in any way?

Why do I think this way?

Where do these beliefs originate from? Are these beliefs mine?

Do I really want to pollute my mind in this way?”

Ask questions in order to find the answers, for in these answers you’ll discover that you don’t have to believe everything you think.

“The power to question is the basis of all human progress.”~ Indira Gandhi

4. Be willing to change your mind

Having the same thoughts over and over again will do you no good. The same old thoughts will lead to the same old behaviors and the same old behaviors will lead to the same old results. If you are not happy with where you are and what you have, be willing to embrace change, be willing to change your mind.

No matter how old you are, no matter what part of the world you are living in, no matter what your religion is, no matter what skin color you have, it’s never too late to change your mind. It’s never too late to let go of who you think you are in order to allow yourself to become what you could be.

“We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.” ~ Albert Einstein

5. Envision the end result

What are the attitudes you want to embody, what are the skills you want to master? What do you want people to recognize you for? What is the envisioned result of your thoughts, decisions, and actions? Know where you want to be and who you want to be and start taking action.

“Vision without action is a daydream. Action without vision is a nightmare.” ~ Japanese Proverb

6. Look into your mind’s eye – visualize to materialize

Once you know what you want to achieve, once you know the person you want to become and the level of confidence you want to master, things will start to fall into place and by using the power of visualization things will get a lot easier. It’s so important for you to look into your mind’s eye and visualize the desired outcome, to see yourself as already being the person you want to become and as already having achieved all the things you want to achieve.

I really love how George Kohlrieser talks about this in his book, Hostage at the Table: How Leaders Can Overcome Conflict, Influence Others: “The power of imagination is incredible. Often we see athletes achieving unbelievable results and wonder how they did it. One of the tools they use is visualization or mental imagery… they made the choice to create their destinies and visualized their achievements before they ultimately succeeded.”

7. Get emotional

You want to make sure that in the end all of the things you envisioned will eventually materialize, and by assuming the feelings that come from having the things you want to have and by feeling the feelings that come from being the person you want to be, you will accelerate the manifestation process, and you will help bring into form the things you need even faster.

“The emotions aren’t always immediately subject to reason, but they are always immediately subject to action.” ~ William James

~love, Luminita💫

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Luminita D. Saviuc

Luminita, the Founder of PurposeFairy, is an enthusiastic student of the arts, psychology, and spirituality. Her acclaimed blog post, 15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy , was shared by over 1.3 million people on Facebook. Later on, it became the heart of her book, 15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy., book that was published by Penguin Random House. For more details check out the 15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy Book Page.

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23 Comments

  • Cindy Davis

    5, October 2012 at 5:24 pm

    We get stuck in the process at times, but I really really want to move into new territory of being a much more simplified person, in that I mean, make my life less complicated and be less analytical. Give it a rest, my always thinking brain – so I can actually enjoy the journey I'm creating. I love this site.

  • Manny Adame

    5, October 2012 at 4:41 pm

    This is mind blowing ,but true the mind is a Powerfull Tool

  • Darlene Spiegel

    5, October 2012 at 4:27 pm

    Great post. YOU are always on the mark with what I am feeling or working on at the time. I am thinking on a problem and there you are! Uncanny. Thank You Darlene.

  • Jenny

    5, October 2012 at 4:13 pm

    Thanks for sharing!. A great post, in the right time for me.

  • PMT

    20, September 2012 at 1:38 am

    I am so happy I came about your page on fb… I feel like your posts have really helped me to become a more positive and stress-free person, and I am very thankful! 🙂

  • Joe

    30, August 2012 at 4:09 pm

    Thank you so much for this great post! So many little gems in here. Knowing what you value and the type of person you want to be is SO freeing when it comes to worrying what other people think of you. Thanks for the great reminder!

  • Wendy Kelly

    16, June 2012 at 6:32 pm

    Thanks for this. My son and I were just talking about this yesterday. I gave him some ideas, but this post is just perfect.

    Thank you for the reminder of the Eleanor Roosevelt quote. Perfect.

    • danaadmin

      17, June 2012 at 4:42 am

      Infinite Love and Peace! 🙂

  • Katie

    14, June 2012 at 12:24 am

    This page is amazing…I stumbled across a girl named Gabrielle Bernstein about a year ago and this site is right on track with what she talks about

  • Catherine Vanlandingham

    13, June 2012 at 9:08 pm

    I PARTICULARLY LIKED THE QUESTIONS YOU PROPOSED WE ASK OURSELVES ABOUT OUR INSECURE THOUGHTS. IF THESE THOUGHTS AREN’T PRODUCTIVE, SIMPLY DELETE THEM, TAKE ACTION TO SHOW YOURSELF THAT YOU CAN DO WHATEVER THESE THOUGHTS ARE SAYING YOU CANNOT DO. FEAR IS THE ONLY THING THAT CAN PARALIZE US. CHOOSE TO BE FREE FROM IT. BIBLE SAYS, DO NOT FEAR OVER 366 TIMES. ONCE FOR EACH DAY!

  • Walidah

    13, June 2012 at 5:02 pm

    Wow, so empowering….thank you.

  • Barbara

    13, June 2012 at 4:58 pm

    I just caught up with the last 3 posts, was stressed now not so much! Love reading your posts!

  • trixie

    13, June 2012 at 4:03 pm

    Your timing is always right on!

  • Beth

    13, June 2012 at 2:30 pm

    Someone turned me onto this site about a month ago and I’m really enjoying your posts. This one in particular. Steps 1 and 2 in my opinion are the hardest and most important. Once YOU believe you are worth all the benefits the universe can give, only then can it manifest. So simple….but sometimes challenging. Thanks for the wonderful posts this morning. I needed it!

  • Wise Grasshopper

    13, June 2012 at 2:09 pm

    Wow!!! Needed this message today. Great Reminder!!

  • Dr Leta

    13, June 2012 at 11:59 am

    Wonderful read for my morning. I have been challenged lately & you are inspiring me to think about issues with a different perspective. Thank u Dana

    • danaadmin

      13, June 2012 at 1:57 pm

      Happy to see this 🙂

  • Jen

    13, June 2012 at 11:00 am

    Brilliant! Thank you :}

  • Alanna Jane

    13, June 2012 at 7:02 am

    wonderful!

  • Kelly Origel

    13, June 2012 at 6:58 am

    I needed this too. Thank you very much

  • Jenny

    13, June 2012 at 4:23 am

    Sigh, just what I needed right now. Thank you so much!

    • danaadmin

      13, June 2012 at 1:57 pm

      Whatever we need the Universe will provide 🙂

  • laurie

    13, June 2012 at 1:28 am

    for me

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