“Fear keeps us focused on the past or worried about the future. If we can acknowledge our fear, we can realize that right now we are okay. Right now, today, we are still alive, and our bodies are working marvelously. Our eyes can still see the beautiful sky. Our ears can still hear the voices of our loved ones.” ~ Thich Nhat Hanh
What is a F.E.A.R. and where it originates? We are afraid of so many things and because of that so many of us, instead of moving forward in life, stagnate or move backward. This is not how life should be lived, in fear and stress. I know there are many fears that we all might experience, less or more, and from all of these fears, I have chosen to focus on the ones I found to be the most present in people’s lives.
1. Fear of Letting Go
We fear to let go of familiar places; we fear to let go of relationships that no longer serve us; we fear to let go of who we once were, of our past and we cling to all of these things, thoughts, beliefs and ideas without realizing that the past is gone forever and all that we will ever have is this very present moment. If we choose to constantly think about what once was, we miss out on what is happening in our lives in this very moment, we miss out on life. We need to learn how to let go of the things that no longer serve you and allow ourselves to be free of fear and free of stress.
“Your past history and all of your hurts are no longer here in your physical reality. Don’t allow them to be here in your mind, muddying your present moments. Your life is like a play with several acts. Some of the characters who enter have short roles to play, others, much longer. But all are necessary, otherwise, they wouldn’t be in the play. Embrace them all, and move on to the next act.” Wayne Dyer
If we manage to let go, what will happen then? This is a question that haunts so many of us, and fear of change scares us so badly. Where will we go, what will we do? Are we going to be safe? What will happen to us? We have this incredibly powerful fear of change and fear of the unknown that paralyzes so many of us, not understanding that if we keep on doing the things that we’ve always done and if we keep on living in the familiar without leaving our comfort zone, we will always end up in the same situations. There will be no movement, no growth.
Trust yourself. Learn to listen to your heart and intuition and know that the life you want wants you.
And if we embrace change, what if we will meet with failure and defeat? Who will we be then and what will our lives look like? This fear of failure keeps so many of us from moving forward in life, from going out there and trying new things. A lot of times, even though we are not happy with where we are and what we do, we would rather stay in our comfort zone than do something different, something new, just because we have this fear of failure hunting us, not seeing that
“The only real failure in life is the failure to try.”
4. Fear of Being Different
Do you want to be normal right? You want to be like everybody else. Why be different? This is not a healthy approach to life, I would say. Constantly trying to please everybody around you and forgetting about the person who matters the most, and that is YOU, will bring so much unhappiness upon us. You don’t want to be like everybody else, you want to be YOU, true to yourself, and if that implies you being different than those around you, so be it.
Keep in mind that,
“Those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.” Dr. Seuss
5. Fear of Unleashing Our Hidden Potential
Whether you believe it or not, this fear actually keeps us even farther away from making our dreams come true, from going out there and sharing with the world our amazing gifts and talents. This is because, whether we consciously realize it or not, the exposure and the responsibilities that will come once we unleash our potential scares us. We want to move forwards, at least consciously we think we do, but deep down in our subconscious mind, we keep the foot on the breaks.
We are trying to move forward but with the breaks on. You have no idea how much power the subconscious mind has and how, even though we say we want something, we get stuck because of what is hidden in our subconscious mind.
Especially when you are constantly seeking approval from those around you in order to feel good about yourself, to feel that you are worthy, to feel validated. Whenever this fear knocks on your door, keep this in mind:
“You are always a valuable, worthwhile human being, not because anybody says so, not because you’re successful, not because you make a lot of money, but because you decide to believe it and for no other reason.” Wayne Dyer
Nobody wants to be lonely, especially when you can’t stand the person you are alone with, and you and I know that there are plenty of us in this situation. We come to this world alone, and we will depart alone. If you get to this point where you have accepted yourself completely, where you have learned to love and nurture the person you are deep down inside, you will never feel lonely again because you will now enjoy your company so much and believe me, others will too.
8. Fear of Losing a Loved One
It’s hard to lose somebody you love, and I don’t know how many people can actually deal with the thought of losing a dear one without feeling sad and blue. It’s a normal fear I will have to say, but if we start appreciating these people more, expressing our gratitude for their presence in our lives while they are still here, when the time will come for them to leave this world, it will be a lot easier for us and we will not have to suffer that much. Instead of using your time to worry and fear about it, you can use that time to show them how much you love them and to confess to them this love.
It will do you and them so much good.
9. Fear of Dying
Oh my, this is another one, a very powerful and delicate one I will have to say. We fear death for we have no idea what will happen after, and if you think about it, it’s a lot like the fear of the unknown.
“The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears, for there’s no risk of accident for someone who’s dead.” ~ Albert Einstein
It doesn’t really matter what religion we belong to, whether we have one or not, and what our thought and beliefs regarding death are, for this does not keep us away from having this fear of dying. When the time will come, we will all have to leave this beautiful Earth, but until that day, let’s just enjoy our time here, shall we?
Don’t you think it is a better idea than spending your time worrying about it?
“The safest course is to do nothing against one’s conscience. With this secret, we can enjoy life and have no fear from death.” Voltaire
Why do you think so many people live in fear instead of being motivated by the things they love? You can share your comments by joining the conversation in the comment section below 🙂