Take Responsibility For Your Life

“The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own.  You do not blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the president.  You realize that you control your own destiny.” Albert Ellis

Why won’t people take responsibility for the mess they are creating each and every single day in their lives? Why in the world would you choose to give others credit for your insanity? If I hear another person complaining and playing the victim, I will go crazy.

I am starting to believe that these people love to be in this state, they love to whine and complain about everything and everyone. This is who they are and if things are going too well for them, they will eventually find a way to turn it into something that will give them another reason to complain.

“Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain – and most fools do.” Dale Carnegie

For these people life is a a continuous struggle, a fight for survival. They see life as a battlefront, a never ending battlefront. Isn’t it sad? Always looking at the dark side of everything, always focusing their attention on what is lacking, what is missing. We just love to complain, don’t we? Nothing will ever be good enough for them. How can that be, when they are only seeing what is negative? If you look for poverty, that is exactly what you will see, if you think there is crime and hatred in the world, that is exactly where you will focus your attention on, and that is exactly what you will encounter. It’s that simple. If you think life is beautiful, you will only focus your attention on those people, those situation that will prove you just that.

I have a friend who is complaining about the society we live in, about the people around us, about the poverty and misery, the ignorance that is all around us, about everything I will say, every single year for the past 4 or 5 years I think. It is exhausting to hear her talk. I could say she is an energy vampire. Nothing is good for her, and the way I see it, nothing will ever be. She looks for things that will make her mad, she looks for people that will frustrate her, for every single thing that is going wrong in order for her to have something to complain about. She keeps waiting for the world to change in order for her to be finally be happy. So please, can we all change so she could be happy? How insane is this?

I love to talk to people, to listen their stories, their worries, their struggles, and I love to make them see how they are worrying their life away and help them focus more on what is good in their life, but when you see that they keep on doing the same things that they have always done and every time getting frustrated with the result they get, result that is very familiar to the… When they come to you for advice, when they come to you so they can give you all of their negative energy, you are no longer interested, for you now know that you are wasting precious time on people that are only pretending to be listening to what you have to say, or maybe they are listening but they never show improvements.

It’s not worth the effort. You try and try, over and over again, and it’s heart breaking to see that nothing has changed, and they keep on living their lives in destructive ways, blaming everybody for their misery. These people are so depressed. I remember I had a long talk with this person and she was filled with anxiety, frustration, with anger. You could feel how she was sucking all of the energy out of your body, and at the end, she left feeling great. She had a few days of feeling “happy”. The strongest energy always wins, and her’s was way stronger then mine. But that would not be a problem for me, for I always get back to my natural state, and unfortunately the same goes with them.

You would think that after feeling the way they felt while being in that state, seeing how good it feels not to let your mind control you, but the other way around, you would want to stay in that state and you would want to make it last, you would want to work on being grateful and content all the time, but no…

Added by Luminita Saviuc on 31, January 2011